Sometimes we don’t fully know our triggers until we experience them
Little interactions creating big pains
Big cuts, big hurts
In isolation, it makes no sense
But how many times can you poke at a balloon before it pops?
I feel like my heart is breaking faster than I know how to pick up the pieces
I’m not sure I can fix it
I’m trying but I don’t know how
That’s the thing about triggers
You never know they’re happening until all the feelings come rushing back
But there’s no turning back
There’s no going back in time to fix them
To fix you.
So there’s no fixing me
I’m trying to be fine but I don’t know how to be
I don’t think there’s a love that allows me to be me
Because each time I try, I see that the problem is me.
I don’t want to hurt you
But this is also something you don’t deserve to go through
Feels something like a catch twenty two
I’m torn between hurt and learning to love you.
I already love you
I’m scared that’s what will hurt you.
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